One time Beth Moore picked me out of a crowd and called me to the stage and gave me a “truth” I was to “hang on to”.
The night before we had written the lies we had been believing on a piece of paper and we threw them in the trash. The next day, we came in and she told us that we had been treasuring the trash and trashing the treasure. Over night, God had taken all those lies we had been believing and exchanged them for a truth that we all needed to believe. She pulled it from the trash can and it had 3 words on it. She said, “this truth is meant for somebody in this room”. I had no idea what it said, but knew it was meant for me, so I raised my hand.
Out of thousands of women in the auditorium, she looked at me, pointed to me and called me out. I went to the stage and she looked me in the eyes and said, “This truth is meant for you. You hang on to it. And don’t you EVER forget it or let anyone tell you different” She read the paper. Those three words- I AM FORGIVEN.
I still remember her talking about identity theft. How the enemy rummages through our garbage and he sees what we don’t believe enough to keep. He sees what we throw away and then tells us who we are based on what we trash and what we treasure.
It was a year TO THE DAY after that that I forgot what I treasured and threw it away. It was a step in defiance to the Spirit of God working in me and it broke me. It destroyed a piece of me that had operated in confidence and it compromised my future and rocked the security of my family. I am still recovering.
But God, in His sovereignty, showed me in a moment, when I was at the most desperate place of my existence, that He knew I’d choose what I did that day. He knew He would use my total weakness and dependency to draw me to Himself. He knew He’d rebuild me, using my ashes to bring my beauty to the surface.
There’s so much more of this story I need to tell. I believe I’m on the verge of stepping up onto my platform. From there I will tell you, yes, I have fallen to places of unworthiness. But friends – I know that I know that I know I AM FORGIVEN.